Letter to a Young Chef Wife

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Dear Young Chef Wife,

This month my chef/husband and I will be celebrating our 19th wedding anniversary.  It’s hard to believe it’s been that long.  I’m not quite sure where the time went. (Update – We celebrated 24 years in July 2019!  Woohoo!)

As I look back on our marriage, there are so many things I would have done differently as a chef’s wife, if I only knew what I do now.

letter to a young chef wifeI know you love your husband and would do anything for him.  I also know that his career as a chef is tough on your marriage.  I’m writing to you today to encourage you to not give up.  It’s not easy. I’ve been there.  Wait . . . I’m still there!  I’ve learned so much in 19 years and still have so much more to learn in the next 19+ years to come.

I would love to sit down and talk with you, share with you, laugh with you and cry with you about what life is like being married to a chef. But since I have 3 young children, we would probably be interrupted (politely, of course) about 800 times during our chat.  So for the moment, I’ve come up with 11 things that I really wish I would have known early on in my marriage to a chef.  I would love to share them with you.  You might have already figured them out or they might be something you never thought about.  There’s even a chance you might not agree with all of them.  Whatever the case, I hope and pray that they will be helpful to you in your marriage. (more…)

You’re Dating a Chef? Please Read This!

If you’re new to my site, start here.

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If you just googled, “Dating a chef” and arrived here, welcome.  Welcome to this crazy life of being involved with someone in the culinary industry.

I would guess the reason you googled this topic is because dating a chef is not exactly what you expected it would be.  Perhaps you’re lonely, frustrated by the hours, struggling with finding time to spend together, or even time to talk.

Well guess what?

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!! 

WOOHOO!!

Don’t you feel so much better already?

There are tons of us out there, who are somehow connected to a chef . . . married, dating, parents, siblings, etc.

There are others out there who can relate to the crazy obsession with chef knivesthings for the kitchen and cookbooks.  Nice!! 🙂 (more…)

What Chefs Really Eat at the End of the Day

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It’s common knowledge that chefs work long hours and are busy preparing food for others. There’s a ton of articles and TV shows telling us what chefs like to cook.

But are these meals that they “like” to prepare what they actually eat themselves?

At the end of a 12-16 hour day or a 70-80 hour work week, do they head into their kitchen at home and start making these meals they’ve told us about on TV and in magazines?

I wonder…

I am personally not a chef but am married to one. Obviously I can’t speak for all chefs in the world as I haven’t met them all. However, having been married to a chef for 18 years and having interacted with quite a few chefs and their wives/husbands and significant others, I think it’s time to be truthful about this topic and put an end to this myth about how chefs eat at home. (more…)

How to Clean a Chef Coat

If you’re new to my site, start here.

My husband is an amazing chef.  I love to learn from him and enjoy all the food he makes, but I really dislike washing chef coats.   And when I say dislike, I really mean hate.  

I really have nothing nice to say about chef coats.  They are big and bulky and stains stick to them like super glue.

With each restaurant change (and there have been quite a few as my husband has moved up in his career), come new chef coats and the task of finding what cleaning treatment will work the best for that specific coat.

If you are like me, you have googled, “How to clean a chef coat” on numerous occasions as you struggle to get out those stains that somehow made it past the apron.

You might have also wondered why in the world chef coats are white. (You can read more about that here.)

Below are some suggestions on how to clean a chef coat, compiled by myself and other chefs and their wives/significant others.  (Thanks for the help guys!)

(Also, make sure not to miss my post on how to get the smell out of chef clothes.)

(more…)

Tips for Talking to a Chef’s Wife

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Chefwives, you know the conversation.  You’ve just met someone and you’re making small talk about your family, the number of kids you have, where you work, where you live etc.

You know the question is coming.

Wait for it.

Wait for it.

“What does your husband do for a living?”

“My husband is a chef,” you say timidly, knowing one of the statements or questions that will most likely be coming next.

  • You are so lucky!!  I would love to be married to a chef!
  • You must eat so well at home.
  • Holidays must be AMAZING at your house.
  • What’s your husband’s favorite food to make?
  • He should be on Top Chef!
  • How is it that you don’t weigh a ton?
  • What’s your favorite food that that he cooks for you?
  • What restaurant does he work at?  (Insert restaurant name here.)  Oh I love that place!

 Then when people know you a little better, the comments tend to change. (more…)