The One Thing I Wish I Knew Before Raising a Family with a Chef

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I always knew the day would come when I would write about this (or make a video about it).

This is by far the hardest post and most personal topic I’ve ever blogged about.

You see, our home was a pretty miserable place to be for a few years.  My chef/husband and I had many conversations about it, but never really knew the exact problem and because of that, didn’t know how to fix it.

Then one day I figured it out.  It was of course during one of the hardest weeks I’ve ever had as a parent.  But sometimes it takes a really difficult situation to get me to wake up and figure things out.

I wish there was a way to go back in time and tell my younger self what I learned.  I would have been a different parent early on.

 The one thing I wish I had known before raising a family with a chef

Warning:  I cry part way through the video.  This is the second take.  The first was worse!  LOL.  I even cried when I was editing the video.  Sigh. . . parenting is much harder than I ever thought it would be. 🙁

ALSO . . . this started off to be a post about the Elementary years . . . until I started to share about some struggles we’ve been having.  Just wanted to let you know so you didn’t think I messed up and posted the wrong video. 🙂

If you could go back in time and tell yourself one thing before you became a parent, what would it be?  Let me know in the comments below.

You can read the rest of the posts in this series, Raising a Family with a Chef, here.

From one chef’s wife to another,

Jennifer

 

 

17 Comments

  1. Heather (Coulter) Aldridge

    Hi Jennifer! Great post! While not married to a chef, I do have a hard working man who is not around for a lot of “daily life”. I’m a Homeschool mom and so the kids and I are ” in it” full swing. I think it is a great lesson to point out to wives/mothers! Our spouses need to feel valuable in our home and its very easy to unknowingly treat them almost like strangers when they are home. I know you’re not alone and so glad that you were able to make some changes!

    Reply
    • Jennifer

      Thanks for the encouragement Heather! 🙂

      Reply
      • Louise Sherrington

        Watched your video in tears myself. Feeling lonely, bored and isolated. I married a chef 10 years ago. 9 yeara ago we took on our own business. I gave up my career. 2 months ago our business went bust. My husband now works in a hotel 14 hours a day often 6 days a week. I feel as though we are grieving. Our daughters say ‘see you tomorrow’ to Daddy when they leave for school. I really identify with your video and will look at more of your blogs. The life of a chefs wife is long and lonely. I cannot get a job as I have to look after our children. I feel I am living a double life of a single parent and then have to adjust back to a 2 parent family for 1 day a week (2 if we’re very lucky) I honestly dont know if we can make this work.

        Reply
        • Jennifer

          That sounds like a lot going on. 🙁 I totally get the change around the house for 1 or 2 days a week. We have struggled with that as well. Don’t give up! 🙂

          Reply
  2. Corrina

    Hi Jennifer! It’s very inspiring to see you so open, honest, and clearly vulnerable. I’m not married, but my chef and I talk a lot about our future together and having a family one day and I hope that the experiences you share are helpful tools that I can take along with me. Thank you for sharing your story!

    Reply
    • Jennifer

      Thank you Corrina! 🙂

      Reply
  3. Dhanny

    Oh Jenn,
    Thanks for sharing your story…

    Reply
  4. Alyson

    Great post Jennifer, you’re so good at this! We’re calk and cheese, but I appreciated this and took something away from it. Respect!

    Reply
    • Jennifer

      Thanks Alyson. It does seem like we are very different, but glad you could still take something away from it. I hope our paths cross one day. I would love to meet you and your family in person! 🙂

      Reply
  5. Jeannette

    I was married to a guy who, when I met him, was a chef. He was a chef for the 1st 14 yrs of our 30-yr marriage, 23 yrs total (he died 5 yrs ago). I also homeschooled our kids for 11 years, many years while he was working 12-14 hr (mostly evening) shifts. It WAS hard at times & there were days we didn’t talk much. Looking back, I wish we’d spent more time together. Even after he had to quit cooking & opened his own bookkeeping business he still worked 6 days a week & we kind of drifted apart in many ways. I’m now remarried & one of the most important things we do is spend time every morning praying together– that alone helps us stay connected. The Lord will bless you & your family as you seek to please Him.

    Reply
    • Jennifer

      Jeanette, thank you for sharing. I had no idea he was a chef. 🙂 Sounds like you start off your mornings perfectly!!

      Reply
  6. Shannon

    I’ve really been slacking at reading your blog lately, but thank you so much for this video. This is so heartfelt and amazing and it really made me think about our marriage now and in the future.

    Reply
    • Jennifer

      Thanks Shannon. 🙂

      Reply
  7. julianaloh @bilbaobab

    Aw, big hugs to your Jennifer, such strength, patience and maturity. I’ve been married over a year now and no kids in the equation and sometimes I already struggle with managing everything myself on top of a full time job.

    Keep sharing all these amazing tips and stories. Big hugs to you xx

    Reply
  8. Vikki

    Lifting you up to God in thankfulness for you! As a chef wife with a newborn I’m feeling encouraged by the wisdom you share. Our Father calls us to share that wisdoms with one another (Titus 2:3-5) and you are doing just that! Thank you

    Reply
    • Jennifer

      Thank you for the encouragement! We are called to do that and I’m so thankful for the women who have shared with me over the years as well. 🙂

      Reply

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