Do you Ever Feel Like You Are Living Separate Lives?

Why yes I do.  Thanks for asking.

Sometimes I feel like I have my life here at home with the girls and my husband has his life at work and then here at home.  The things we each do in a day are so different from each other.  Our two lives come together for a few minutes a day and then we go our separate ways.

The majority of the year he does get 2 days off a week.  During those weeks, he doesn’t seem like a stranger.  There is time to talk (even if it’s chaotic with kids running around), meals together as a family, etc.  However, there are times, like day 11 of a 14 day stretch with no days off.  This doesn’t happen often, but occasionally it does.  I really miss him during those times.

11 long days of work in a row.  Has anyone seen my husband?  (Just kidding.)  Oh look, the restaurant just posted a picture of him on Twitter.  (Seriously, this has happened before and I laughed and said to myself, “Oh look, that’s what my husband is up to right now.” (more…)

Chef Wives, You Are Not a Single Parent

I wrote the post below back in July, but never published it. Tonight I’m sitting on the bed, wishing my husband was home with us. It’s Cinco de Mayo – the busiest night of the year for his restaurants. We haven’t seen him all week and we miss him. I’m tired. The kids have been arguing while making Mother’s Day cards. (Really?????? I don’t want have to discipline for that!! Ugh!! I really wish he were here to deal with the Mother’s Day card arguing…)

Have you ever referred to yourself as a single parent because of your husband’s career as a chef?

They work a ton of hours.  They are gone the majority if not all of the hours the kids are awake. Because of this, the parenting on the days they work (and sometimes even on their days off) falls on us.

It’s hard.

I get it.

I’m living it.

There are many days our girls do not see my husband because he leaves before or just as they are getting up and gets home just after they are in bed. Having a 1 hour + commute on top of the long hours of a chef is tough. My husband would have to leave work at 5 pm (and then sit in the car for 2 hours because of traffic) to be home to see them for an hour before they go to bed (which is not their best time of day). The mornings, it’s the same. If he doesn’t leave before 6 am, the commute can be almost 2 hours long. There’s really no option for a change of hours, so we find way to work with the schedule the best we can.

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The One Thing I Wish I Knew Before Raising a Family with a Chef

I always knew the day would come when I would write about this (or make a video about it).

This is by far the hardest post and most personal topic I’ve ever blogged about.

You see, our home was a pretty miserable place to be for a few years.  My chef/husband and I had many conversations about it, but never really knew the exact problem and because of that, didn’t know how to fix it.

Then one day I figured it out.  It was of course during one of the hardest weeks I’ve ever had as a parent.  But sometimes it takes a really difficult situation to get me to wake up and figure things out.

I wish there was a way to go back in time and tell my younger self what I learned.  I would have been a different parent early on.

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Raising a Family with a Chef

I’ll be honest.  This is by far the hardest topic I’ve written about on this blog yet.  I always knew there would be a time to talk about it, but honestly, when you’re in the middle of a struggle or trial, writing about it and sharing about it with the world is the last thing you want to do.

Yet, here I am.  About to spill my guts about what it’s like to parent alongside a chef.  It’s not easy.

Parenting is a trillion times harder than I EVER thought it would be.

It’s very rewarding and I love being a Mom.  But WOW!  It’s not easy!

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Mother of a Chef

As Mother’s Day approaches, I know for many of us, it will just be a normal day . . . husband at work (on arguably the busiest day of the year) and us home with the kids.  But instead of dwelling on that, I thought it would be fun to hear what it’s like to be the mother of a chef and who better to chat about this with than my sweet mother-in-law, Susan!

My husband and I started dating when I was 15 and he was 16.  From the very first time I was over at their house, (as a girlfriend, not as a 5 year old with my family who supposedly sang and danced in front of the fireplace) I was treated like family.

There are many things I admire about my mother-in-law but the main one that stands out to me is her love for and dedication to her family.  There is nothing she (and my father-in-law) wouldn’t do for her children and their families.  The time and effort she puts into being a Mom and Grandma amazes me every day.  She is a wonderful example of a godly Mother and wife and I am so grateful God allowed me to marry into her family and to be able to call her Mom.

So as we get ready to celebrate her this weekend (from 19 hours away – BOO!!), I thought it would be fun to ask her some questions about what it is like to be the mother of a chef AND the mother of a general manager/restaurant owner.

Yes, you read that right.  2 out of her 3 adult children are in the restaurant industry! (more…)

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