On the blog, I spend a lot of time writing about our chefs and how their career impacts our lives and the lives of our family. I even wrote an entire ebook about supporting them. But what about us? What about our career? What about our dreams and desires? I know there are 2 of us in the relationship. I haven’t forgotten about you! The other day, I received a comment on this post that really got me thinking. As I read it, I began to think of everyone I have made connections with this past year and wondered if many of you were thinking the same thing this reader was. Here’s what she asked:
“Is it possible to be a working wife of chef? Someone’s got to give and I gave up my career when I moved, only to start something else that is taking off. How do you prioritize? What about your own feelings and your contributions too?I realize that the kinder and more patient I am, the more considerate he is. And when I’m a total grouch, all hell breaks loose.I know acceptance is key, and we all know managing a chef’s ego is a delicate issue. I still find it hard to accept the age old stereotype that the wife has always to be the one making sure all is in perfect order for the chef to come home to, because in all honesty – it’s pretty hard too working, running the household, and those with kids, it’s like triple shift work!”
So leaving kids out of the equation, let’s talk about that for a bit. Is it truly possible to have a successful career and be married to a chef (or dating one)? (more…)
I don’t know about you, but there are times when I feel my like chef/husband is a stranger because I haven’t see him much.
It’s not always easy to get a hold of him when he’s at work. So when he finally has a day off, I could talk his ear off (but I try not to)!
With the limited time we have together as a chef couple, what’s the best way to communicate both while at work and at home?
When I think about communication with my chef/husband, there are really a few ways I go about it. It’s very different trying to talk with him while he’s at work vs. when he’s at home.
Let’s start off with home. I don’t know about your chef, by my husband is pretty exhausted when he gets home at night and on his days off. I usually have a few things I’d like to talk to him about, and there’s usually time. It’s finding the best time that’s important. I have found it best to never, ever, ever, ever, ever talk to him about something important when he’s tired. It never goes well. If he’s too tired to think clearly, that’s not the time I want to be talking about money or problems with the kids. (It’s the same if I’m totally exhausted as well.) If a good time presents itself (kids are occupied, chef/husband is rested, etc.) then we talk about the important things. If not, there’s always plan B . . . (more…)
Ask any chef wife or significant other whose chef has been working in the kitchen for a while about their chef’s injuries and well . . . you better grab a cup of coffee and a chair because you might be there for a while.
Over the past 19 years we’ve dealt with cuts, burns, a broken back and torn ligaments, just to name a few.
Now it’s not totally fair to put all the blame on the career. When my chef/husband makes eating healthy and working out a priority, he can physically handle the job easier. However, when things get really busy as work, those are the things that tend to be pushed to the side. (This happens with many of us, not just chefs, right?)
However, no matter how good of shape you are in, sometimes injuries happen.
Right now, my chef/husband is sporting a lovely black cast on his left arm. (I would show you a picture, but decided to skip asking him if I could take one as I know he hates it when I take his picture. You can take a peek at it in this Facebook post from New Year’s Eve.) He’s left handed. He doesn’t have any broken bones, but has torn ligaments in his elbow from repetitive movements (chopping, working the sauté station, etc.) Even with the cast on, he’s in a lot of pain. (more…)
You know how your chef comes home too exhausted to really do anything, but you want to spend time together? What do you do besides sit around and stare at each other or the TV?
Earlier this week I received the following question from a reader on another blog post.
“What activities can we do that are not too exhausting for him, are not on a precise date, and can be done after 5 pm (his morning shift ends and I can afford to get off work)?”
The other day, I received a comment on this post that really got me thinking. As I read it, I began to think of everyone I have made connections with this past year and wondered if many of you were thinking the same thing this reader was. Here’s what she asked:
