Why I Deactivated my Facebook Account (and then reactivated it)

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I started blogging back when scrapbooking became difficult because of small children.  I wanted to have a way to remember things that were going on in our lives without having to worry about my 2 year old injuring herself with one of my many scrapbooking supplies.  While our family blog has been an off and on ordeal, we all enjoy looking back at previous posts to see things we’ve done.  Sometimes, I write posts to myself so I’ll look back and remember something.  This is one of those posts.

This morning I decided to deactivate my personal Facebook account.  This is not easy for me as I am a very social person and love to know what’s going on in people’s lives.  However, everyone’s life looks perfect on Facebook.  I know it’s not, but when I’m sitting at home browsing through my newsfeed, it’s hard not to think how amazing everyone else’s life is and I am jealous at times.  My life is not horrible.  It could just be that I’m depressed and it’s December (and I’m married to a chef, remember?  We haven’t seen my husband in a while.  The girls and I are out doing fun things, but miss him terribly!!)  God has blessed me more than I could ever deserve, but I already struggle with contentment and Facebook makes it even harder.

Life is not perfect and that’s OK.  Perfection will be in Heaven for eternity.  This life and world are only temporary.  I realized the other day that I too tend to portray our life as perfect.  Looking at my own timeline and even our Christmas letter that I sent out a few weeks ago, our family life looks pretty perfect.  I even had a friend in CA respond to our Christmas letter that they were so happy that things were going so well for us and that we looked so happy.

Let’s face it, who wants to read that your Facebook friend is lonely because their husband is working hard for a crazy amount of hours to provide for them, frustrated that their shoulder hurts so bad they had to ask a friend to go to Costco with them today to push a shopping cart, is missing family so much this time of year (especially my Mom), struggling with how to create a peaceful home for her husband to come home to, feels like they are failing as a mom and wife so many days . . . the list could go on.

Who would like to read those posts?  I WOULD!!  Not that I don’t want to know the great things that are going on in everyone’s life, nor do I want to read someone complaining all the time, but Facebook is just not real life.  It’s like a reality show – you get to pick what parts you put on for others to see.  Again, don’t misread what I’m saying.  I don’t want to come across as complaining.  But life is not perfect and things are not always amazing and worthy of a post on Facebook.

I know many of my friends who are struggling with things and all it takes is a couple minutes one-on-one with them to figure that out.  That is real life, not Facebook life.  Depending on the day and friend, if might only take one look and a few words from me to bring me to tears as I spill my guts (as a friend found out yesterday after workout.)

With all that said, at this point in my life I do not have enough self-control to just stay off of Facebook.  I also manage some Facebook pages for work and need to be on a few times a week for that.  So the best option for me is to deactivate my personal account and to just have a Facebook page to manage business pages and follow a few blogs.  I know I will miss out on a lot and will not be able to stalk someone’s timeline when they are in labor, but I will survive.  I did for many years.

I will continue to blog and follow the lives of friends through their blogs.  I will continue to hangout, email, text and use my phone.  I will continue to pray for family and friends even if I don’t know exactly what is going on in their lives.  God knows.

It is well with my soulToday I will chose to be content with my life and whatever circumstances God has chosen to put me in because that is what He calls me to do.  While things change minute by minute, including my mood, Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever and I need to remember to be grateful for all that He has done for me and given me.

Hebrews 13:1-8

“Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it. Continue to remember those in prison as if you were together with them in prison, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering.  Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,  “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”  So we say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.  What can mere mortals do to me?” Remember your leaders, who spoke the word of God to you. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith.  Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”

Update:

Turns out I have some accounts linked to my Facebook profile that I have needed to access and have needed to contact a few people whom I can only connect with on FB at this point.  So I reactivated my account a month later.  It was a nice month off and I’m pleased to say, I’ve been on Facebook much less since my break.  I don’t regret my decision.  I guess I could have just deleted this post, but it’s a great reminder to myself about contentment and how I need to not compare myself to others!

From one chef’s wife to another,

Jennifer

 

 

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